so my vow to you is that i won’t talk about my hair too much…after today.

usually, when i am talking to someone else, be it a friend, a retail salesman, or a stylist, and the topic of “my look” comes up, my face flatlines, and i simply say: if it can’t happen in 5 minutes, it’s not going to work for me.

so when i am sitting in the hair salon last week, getting my hair cut for the first time since november 2008, and my hairstylist says to me in her heavy ukrainian accent, “do you have flat iron?” my face assumed the normal position [flat] and i said, “nope.” and she continued to cut. now she and i have had a fairly clear understanding in our three year relationship together of how i operate — I AM LOW MAINTENANCE.

yet she continued to cut my hair…into this.

my theory is this: my hairdresser took matters into her own hands, and she hosted a revolt.

she decided that the days are gone where i no longer needed to wake up and go. and maybe she has a point. i am nearly 28 years old. maybe it’s time for me to figure out how to take care of myself, rather than have my self take care of itself.

it didn’t really hit me that i was going to have work on “my look “when i got home from the salon. so for the first couple of days i tried my best to do my hair with no help other than my ancient hairdryer. the first day i just didn’t wash my hair. it’s how i styled it with my pixie cut, why wouldn’t it work here? the hair’s short. same difference, right?

it was not working out.

so for the first time in at least 8 years, i went to the hairdryer section of a store. i stared at the wall of flat irons, in a haze.

i was there for 10 minutes, looking at every box, learning about how this one has anti-microbial blah, and this one heats up in blah seconds, and that one costs 30 bucks, while this one costs $150. ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY DOLLARS. AT TARGET. what??

i was in a daze and a panic all at the same time. i couldn’t make the commitment by myself. so i went and found mike who was bolstering our ever-growing collection of gigantic cans of vegetarian baked beans, and i asked for his help.

10 minutes more in front of the wall, and a decision had been made.

so home we went, and i tried things out right away.

and i’ve got to tell you, i can get the job done. i can wash my hair, dry it, roll it, and flat iron it. and it turns out fairly well. i’ve surprised myself, really.

but here’s my worry: at some point, hopefully in the near-ish future (please PLEASE let it be soon-ish), i will have a job. which i have to get ready and be present for before noon. every day.

hopefully i can get faster in this getting ready thing. but for now, i’m not totally convinced that non-low maintenance works for me.

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